Happy Australia Day everyone! Well it was yesterday anyway.
Australia Day is one of my favourite days of the year. BBQ, beer, beach, cricket, and the Hottest 100. This year was pretty much a combination of all the above for me (although the cricket was a bit disappointing).
So Angus & Julia Stone won the Hottest 100 with Big Jet Plane.
What. The. Fuck.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a bad track, but definitely not the best of the year. I had my hopes on Sparkadia’s Talking Like I’m Falling Down Stairs, which ended up No23(so not too bad). And 7 of my 10 picks got in, including 3 in the top 10 so I’m pretty happy with it overall.
Moving onto this week's joke, I thought I’d get an Aussie one in there to keep the theme going...
The scene is set, the night is cold, the campfire is burning and the stars twinkle in the dark night sky...
Three hang-glider pilots, one from Australia, one from South Africa and the other from New Zealand, are sitting round a campfire near Ayers Rock, each embroiled with the bravado for which they are famous.
A night of tall tales begins...
Kiven, the kiwi says,
"I must be the meanest, toughest heng glider dude there us. Why, just the other day, I linded in a field and scared a crocodile thet got loose from the swamp. Et ate sux men before I wrestled ut to the ground weth my bare hends end beat ut's bliddy 'ed un.
Jerry from South Africa typically can't stand to be bettered.
"Well you guys, I lended orfter a 200 mile flight on a tiny treck, ind a fifteen foot Namibian desert snike slid out from under a rock and made a move for me. I grebbed thet borsted with my bare hinds and tore it's head orf ind sucked the poison down in one gulp. Ind I'm still here today".
Barry the Aussie remained silent, slowly poking the fire with his penis.
True Aussie bloke there.
Alright, enough chit chat, onto the funnies.
Enjoy the pics, and enjoy your weekend :)