Thursday, 28 October 2010

I love Thursdays. Because the weekend is so close. Which makes posting the Thursday Funnies even better, because it reminds me how close the weekend is!

So I turn now to the best news story all week. A guy had an argument with a ‘friend’ who just happened to be a tattoo artist. And how did the tattoo artist retaliate? By suggesting he tattoo a yin yang symbol on the guy’s back as a peace offering...only to tattoo a 40cm penis on his back HAHAHAHAHA it’s so bad, but just so funny. See the article here...

http://www.couriermail.com.au/news/queensland/ipswich-tattooist-charged-over-40cm-penis-tattoo-on-mans-back/story-e6freoof-1225943547765

The tattoo guy will be living off that fame for years. Although maybe in gaol, because he has been charged with a few offences for it. Apparently it will take 9 months of painful treatment to remove it. Hey, why not just leave it on?

Moving on to this week’s joke:

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed.

She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him.

She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him.

He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.

She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee.

'What's the matter, dear?' she whispers as she steps into the room, 'Why are you down here at this time of night?'

The husband looks up from his coffee, 'I am just remembering when we first met 20 years ago and started dating. You were only 16. Do you remember back then?' he says solemnly.

The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so sensitive.

'Yes, I do' she replies.

The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily.

'Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?'

'Yes, I remember!' said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continues. 'Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years?'

'I remember that too' she replies softly.

He wipes another tear from his cheek and says...

'I would have been released today.'

Hahaha, ah you just feel for the guy, don’t you?

That’s enough chat, onto the funnies.

Enjoy the pics, and enjoy your weekend :)

Thursday, 21 October 2010

Another Thursday, another round of funnies.

Curious…are people digging the moving gifs? I get they probably take a bit longer to load, but I find them hilarious. Let me know…

So that chick suing David Jones got $850,000.00 in settlement. What a FREAKIN JOKE! Imagine if that was a bloke claiming that against a woman. Wouldn’t have even got to the stage of issuing proceedings. And her claim for $36M was just ridiculous. I can’t believe the courts didn’t throw it out based on that alone. Surely there would be no proof of quantum. But alas, the publicity and media and reputation and all that crap gets involved, and they settle. Just a money hungry ***** if you ask me. And in the end she wins.

Anyway, moving on. Let’s go onto this week’s joke:

So a guy hires a hooker.

The hooker tells him it will be $200.00, and she goes into the bathroom to get ready.

When she comes out the man is jerking off like crazy.

He finally comes, and the hooker looks at him in confusion and asks him,

"What was that about?"

The man says,

"For $200.00 dollars, you think I'm giving you the easy one?"

Haha an ideas man that one.

Enough of this chat, onto the funnies.

Enjoy the pics, and enjoy your weekend :)